Sri Sri Makes Play For Capitol Hill Hospital

File under: Back-Room Gurudom

It looks like our front-runner for Hypocritical Guru of the Year, Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, is trying to establish himself in that world capital of hypocritedom, Washington D.C. Sri Sri is making a play for the Old Naval Hospital on Capitol Hill, ostensibly to be used as an Art of Living wellness center (and concealed devotee recruitment facility, obviously.)

This plan appears to be dovetailing quite nicely with Sri Sri's play to become an even bigger world religious leader than he already believes he is. Could the Republican Party have picked up on our suggestion to accept Sri Sri as their guru? We've provided a handy chart to help you compare their attributes:

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar	Republican Party
Covers for genocidal racists	Uses "bad" intel as cover to invade Iraq
Spoke to the UN	Wants to destroy the UN
Can duck direct questions	Won't answer a question directly
Wants to be a world religious leader	Wants to be the world's dictator

Clearly, a match made in Heaven... er, Vrindaban. We hear that Heaven continues to be fought over by the Mormons and the Fundies at this time, with the Catholic Church poised to swoop in and steal it all from the exhausted victors' hands.