John DeRuiter Update

File under: The Siddhi of PR

A reader sends us an update on John DeRuiter of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, a noted nonduality purveyor who kinda seems like a jerk, although he gets a tip o' the turban for openly pulling a pair of sisters as his girlfriends:

Well folks, it must be time for an update. It is now 2009 and where are we now with John DeRuiter? Having been around John for many years I'm pretty sure I can give a fair assessment of what is happening around him, but then again I'm a bit of a shit disturber and actually still have a brain and my critical thinking capacity.

Firstly, people commenting on JDR who have not personally sat with him are completely in the dark and are making uninformed decisions in their comments (much the same as the people who voted for George Dubyuh.)

Now 10 years later, John still has a relationship with the two woman (sisters) who he dumped his wife for. (Actually, he gave his wife the choice to join the harem, she declined.) There is no love lost between the two sisters and they are much like acid and ice cream—not a good mix. Acid, Benita, is in charge of everything. She had no people skills whatsoever when she started the job and now she has at least one or two, so she is growing. The main woman in charge at the time was dumped with the excuse that she needed a vacation. That woman probably still questions her worthiness, but now I'm speculating.

I've had many deep experiences sitting with John and will tell you that he has never bitten me, (probably because I bite back.) But I would never take some of the crap that he dishes to some people, but they invariably take it. Over all, it's unbelievably boring. We sit, we gaze, he gazes. It's all very peaceful, like a graveyard, or should I say mausoleum, as the new digs are all marble and chandeliers.

My main complaint was that if you were to ask John a challenging question, he very often reverts to silence, and that cuts out any chance of a dialogue about truth or anything else. By doing so, he chooses always to be in "Power" position and you, the questioner, become secondary chimpanzee without a voice. It truly sucks and is completely disempowering. There can be no "Real" dialogue because he's always in charge of the situation.

The majority of people in the group are pretty "John Gone," and there is no focus on critical questioning as the group has silently agreed that that is not cool. I think they call it co-dependency. The sad thing with almost any guru who answers all questions is that it basically makes you a bit stupid and you will always second guess your decisions, ("gee, I wonder what John would do?"), and John has an answer for everything. He is an incredibly intelligent speaker and master of the one liner. The problem though is that he has created an obscure language that most humans cannot possibly grasp, and in my opinion has muddied and complicated the pure field of truth.

Many who hang with John get a lot from it. They are intelligent and articulate people and some are real sweethearts. People in the group do have an opinion which they share privately but not publicly.

All in all he seems pretty benign and he ain't no Jim Jones but if you want to truly grow, get the hell out of there and take on life directly.

Maybe not a Jim Jones, but DeRuiter's from-on-high positioning of himself, especially his tendency to duck the tough questions, really only obscures more than clarifies the nondual us. But that could have been a business decision: keep them in mystery and they'll keep coming back (and paying you) for the answer.