Guruphiliac: The Murderin' Maharaj



Saturday, April 07, 2007

The Murderin' Maharaj

File under: Gurus Doin' Time

27-year-old Baba Udaynath Maharaj has been arrested for attempted murder and murder-for-hire in a widening conspiracy to kill a rival of his business partner.

This is what happens when 27-year-olds declare themselves gurus. If you asked us, nobody is really ready for the job until they are at least 40. Regardless of their status as self-realized, they will always lack the miles under their belt to truly function in the capacity of spiritual teacher, especially within the context of today's devotees' expectations of their gurus. Let's face it, 27 is just too young to be any kind of real space-daddy.

On the other hand, perhaps Baba is just another spiritual flimflammer on the make, which in this case seems the more likely possibility.

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11 Comments:

At 4/07/2007 11:48 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Agreed! Kabbalah doesn't "encourage/allow" "people" (used to be men only) to study the mystical Jewish teachings until age 40.

 
At 4/07/2007 3:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gurumayi was all of 26(?) and Swami Nityanand was all of 19(?)when they both took the seat after Muktananda. Maybe Swami Nityanand will have better luck at 44 years of age, now that it looks like Gurumayi has pulled back and has decided to let her devotees figure it out, that is, their sadhana, on their own.

 
At 4/07/2007 5:36 PM, Blogger CHUCK said...

Sounds like this guy is another candidate for castration and rope dragging!

 
At 4/08/2007 4:28 AM, Blogger Global Purple Orchestra said...

This is what happens when 27-year-olds declare themselves gurus. If you asked us, nobody is really ready for the job until they are at least 40.

~~~~ Jody.. Thats when the mid life crisis begin to itch you too below the belt. Ask chuck.
He can show you how he never could get out of it despite crossing it.

How about jesus who did all that he did and wound up on the cross before the profound 40. What about vivekananda who 'blazed a trail' much before 40? Then indeed shankara who died all of 34 with the voluminous literature left behind to his name? Perhaps they were all the inevitable 'avatars' so theres always some difference?

If Truth is ageless, then how does it matter which dude delivers it at what age? I also want to see if all the 40+ gurus are impeccable (like she she ###) ?
Ramesh Balsekar could not raise a stick but was embroiled in 'dipping' at 72?
Rajneesh flew a non stop 18 hours flight because every country wanted him to land elsewhere than their own in order to protect the morality of their men and women ??
Kanchi jeyandra was sent from pillar to post at 74 for slitting down a clerk's throat in some temple because he knew certain inside stories more than the rest??
Now take chuck ? you think he behaves anything more than a 11 year juvenile despite his ripe old age of 85 who's gaseous problems are well known here in the blog....

 
At 4/08/2007 9:14 AM, Blogger CHUCK said...

semblance said...Now take chuck who's gaseous problems are well known here in the blog....

................

He who smelt it dealt it. He who denied it supplied it. The guilty dog barks first. Vivekananda and Shankara are not considered space daddies here, so their age is not pertinent. John Wayne made most of his best westerns only after the age of 40. So there is still hope for you if you'll just put down that pipe and do what your sexy momma wants you to. Get in on this all India rush to world financial power! Fueled by your wide open fart chakra, you will blast your way to the top, youngish man! I am too old to have a mid life crisis. I am the old dog who only wants to curl and sleep at his master's feet!

 
At 4/11/2007 4:10 PM, Blogger Global Purple Orchestra said...

Chuck said>>>He who smelt it dealt it. He who denied it supplied it. The guilty dog barks first.

~~~ Yes chuck. How so true. I called you as a juvenile but you are actually a juvenile delinquent.
Never mind chuck we are used to you by now, especially when your wisdom is showing...

 
At 4/13/2007 12:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

semblance said...Never mind chuck we are used to you by now, especially when your wisdom is showing...

Frankly Chuck, though I am a refined woman, I feel your "fart chakra" material is both innovative and under appreciated. A phrase like that deserves to be more well known in spiritual circles. Bravo, Chuck!

 
At 4/13/2007 3:26 PM, Blogger Global Purple Orchestra said...

Betty !! thats a mistake. You can never win the affection of chuck.
He is a worn out fetish huckster of useless vanities. Mostly what everyone here could smell from his F chuckra is that his is a$$hole offa soul that tries to salvage some leftover false pride and prestige as the irre buttable redneck that sold the stolen cars in dungbox.
You try to please him, then it would amount to going back to your unrefined, days of the yore...
If you are really born again, then it is important that you dont ever try to please a cowboy and waste your already useless vocation....
I respect him only as the most senior tidbid panelist with some funny pejoratives in this blog
and as an accidental disciple of jody.

Even chuck would agree with this..
checkout !!!

 
At 4/14/2007 8:19 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Betty said... Bravo, Chuck!
...................

Thanks, Betty. But now you've stirred up semblance and he's talkin in tongues like a a dog scalded with hot grease!

 
At 4/15/2007 10:04 AM, Blogger Global Purple Orchestra said...

But now you've stirred up semblance and he's talkin in tongues


~~~ I thought about it chuck.
I think im plain jealous. Put yourself in my shoes and see a triple wide takin away all the ladies and an eligible bachelor boy like me is left ditched.
I have had my way with the ladies till recently(not just in my hometown), but now i have to comepete with a ripe ol' cowboy
for a fair share, it kills me inside out...some kriya should help me cool down !!!

 
At 4/16/2007 7:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

semblance said...

~~~ I thought about it chuck.
I think im plain jealous. Put yourself in my shoes...

...........

Don't worry about it semblance. Time is on your side and with the economic rise of India and the descent of the West into chaos, all the fine women will be lookin your way! I'll soon be riding my mule into the sunset!

 

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