Gurucopia: Bapu, Madharishi, Killer Swami And Funny Water

File under: Miscellaneous

• Gurus and airport security just don't jibe in India. Guru Asaram Bapu had to endure the apparent indignity of a secondary inspection at Ahmedabad Airport, prompting an angry protest from his devotees and India's conservative Bharatiya Janata Party. At least they didn't riot this time.

• Guru to the stars Deepak Chopra used his platform as a guest editor of the Times of India to reveal that the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi wasn't dumped by the Beatles for macking on Mia Farrow. Instead, Chopra claims the apparently increasingly senile Madharishi dumped the Beatles for their drug use at the time. With the poor old man not long for this world, we wonder if Chopra isn't making a savvy political move with his recent declaration. If he's getting paid for it, we just hope it's in something other than the Maharishi's mad money.

• The death sentence of Swami Shradhananda was stayed this week by India's Supreme Court. The swami has been charged and convicted of drugging and then murdering "Shakereh, the granddaughter of Sir Mirza Ismail, the former diwan of Mysore, with a view to grabbing her property." We guess you just can't count on what that vow of poverty will get you these days.

• Just when you thought you survived the advent of Kabbalah water comes the world debut of H2Om. Pouring out of the tradition of flimflamming NewAge™ quacks and snake oil schemes, claims are being made for this water's magical ability to hold and transmit intention by way of some good old NewAge™ bunkum. All the same hydration with all the same fantastic claims of magical healing properties, at probably twice the price.