A "Love Guru" Gets Off

File under: Hands Where They Don't Belong and The Siddhi of PR

During the whole Love Guru bombardment of last spring, a little known prosperity guru (read: potential flimflammer) was arrested on charges of sexually assaulting two women:

Bijan Anjomi, 64, was arrested Tuesday and made his first court appearance Wednesday on three counts of sexual assault based on complaints by two unidentified women, the Toronto Star reported Thursday.

Well, late last week, he finally got off with them:

A judge withdrew three sexual assault charges against former Mr. Universe Bijan Anjomi, 64, of Las Vegas, earlier this week. Anjomi was arrested in May after two women said he molested them.

And so Bijan saves himself with his space-daddy powers:

Police said yesterday that while the charges were withdrawn, there is a peace bond between Anjomi and the two women.

Hello! Sounds like some of that prosperity has been getting spread around a little bit. There's nothing better to cement the bond between a space-daddy and a twinkly-eyed young-thing more than showing her money chakra green.

We wonder which love object of Bijanji's posted this PR disaster in the making at Whirled Musings:

Bijan is beyond your belief system and he is human but he is also transparent. [Ed.note: !] He and his wife do not hide their life and sincerely wish peace to all, including you, me, all the blog readers and the women who made the false accusations.

Because we are all One....this includes you, me, Bijan ........and all the other people who have committed sexual offenses or false accusations.......this is part of all of us and we are healing from this all together.

To perhaps aid in Bijanji's healing, we extend the Sri Me Nondual Alibi Achievement Award, hereby created and given to those who use a meaningless interpretation of nondual truth in an attempt to skate themselves out of a tough spot. The award is created in honor of Sri Sri Ravi Shankar's glorious tour de force at an Indian business conference in 2005:

When asked about his views of Narendra Modi, the chief minister of the Indian state of Gujarat, home to violent anti-Muslim riots which Modi implicitly supported, and who was recently denied a visa to enter the US for his involvement in those riots; Sri Sri replied, "I don't comment on individuals because individuals are just part of one wholeness."

We sincerely hope you all recall that he commented on the passing of Pope John Paul II a few short weeks later.

Another "Love Guru" Goes Down In Flames

File under: Gurus Doin' Time and Hands Where They Don't Belong

Maybe it has something to do with global warming:

Bijan Anjomi, 64, was arrested Tuesday and made his first court appearance Wednesday on three counts of sexual assault based on complaints by two unidentified women, the Toronto Star reported Thursday.

The women, ages 27 and 37, told police they went to Anjomi's hotel room on separate occasions in 2006 for what they thought was personal coaching, after attending one of his $600 seminars, Constable Wendy Drummond said.

It must just be too hot in the world for these dirty old "gurus" now. Anjomi, PrakashakaBoomBoom and Kreepalu should all move to Antarctica, where they can practice their slithering up to each other to their hearts' content, out of reach of any more potential victims.