Kreepalu's Kool-Aid Brigade

File under: Gurus Doin' Time, Hands Where They Don't Belong and The Siddhi of PR

He's skated clean away from an indictment on rape charges in Trinidad and Tobago and is allegedly now in Texas, playing God for a pack of dupes in the States. Meanwhile, a public relations war rages on in the comments section of this post, by far the most comments any post has ever received here. Last night, this abortion of everything true and wise about gurudom turned up in his defense:

• Is Kripalu ji incarnation of Krishna?

Not just an incarnation, HE IS KRISHNA HIMSELF!!!

• Is he all knowing and all-powerful?

You bet, he knows your past, present and future. He knows every thought of your mind because he is sitting right in your heart as your own Super Soul. [And pigs fly, bats swim and O.J. Simpson didn't do it, either.] Some times he uses his divine powers only if he chooses to but not always.

• Is consensual sex between devotees and Kripalu ji acceptable?

Yes. He has many devotee-couples living in and out of his ashrams raising their own families. Those females who are totally - 100% dedicated to him can have all possible earthly relations with him whom they worship as Lord Krishna. But only if and when he wants to, not by their demand but by their unconditional surrender and submission to his wishes.

• Will this act take them to Golok?

His devotees already feel fortunate that they are in Golok with their Lord Krishna. Why they need to go any where else?

• What portion of donation is diverted for Kripalu ji and his family?

Everything is offered for his Seva. He in turn takes care of all his Sevak's - devotees' needs, material and spiritual. His family is also being shaped and prepared into playing and taking his role upon them for smooth transition of powers. After him, naturally, they act as his true successors to lead the mission.

You have got to hand it to the randy pervert for turning his sex drive into a gold mine, all just by fooling a quantity of devout idiots who would believe anything anyway, so deep is their infantile drive to have a magic space-daddy in their lives.